Ew gross.

That is what everyone is going to think when they see Ellis from now until May.The poor little guy is just coughing in his sleep and as a result I am lamenting the fact that no one will volunteer to hold him for the next 12 years because he is a huge, walking germ. Oh well. He is my baby and I have to love him.

Point of clarification on my last entry. We in no way can afford a nearly $300 particle board storage cube thing. I don’t know if I was high off the of freedom of shopping sans family (“I’ll take that and that and that” while wildly pointing) or panicking because I realized my phone clock was 15 minutes off and Ellis was about to be the last kid at daycare, but the moment I got home I realized what a terrible idea these cubes were. Oh, I still made Mr. Swirley assemble three of the six – returning them in flat, sealed boxes would be too obvious a case of buyer’s remorse. Plus I was still pretending I could buy whatever I wanted. Once I trade in my avocado and God knows what else-covered receipt for a credit to my MasterCard it will be like I made money! Really Mr. Swirley should be thanking me for this entire time-wasting effort.

In other savings news, we collected all the scrap metal from this little gutter project and cashed it in for a whopping $50.00 ($25.00 of which went to the guy who loaded it into his truck and took it to the scrap yard). And I reviewed my Dominick’s grocery receipt and found that they didn’t give me all of my discounts and got my $6.00 back. Boo-ya! I refuse to leave that place without seeing a 30% savings on my receipt (note the spelling Ms. Davis – you second grade teacher, you). I know they could just lower all of the prices instead of  making me hunt around the store for card prices and “personalized deals”, but they know me too well. If it’s not on sale I am not getting a deal. What is wrong with me?

It’s 3:30 AM my neighbors in the unit directly and two units above are awake. I guess I should ask what is wrong with all of us?

Body movin, body movin. We be getting down and you know we’re crush groovin

Can I say that I consumed two glasses of iced coffee? Or did I drink them? Maybe both are correct? I mean, you consume liquid right? What is wrong with me? My mind is racing. Usually I  make myself a nice liter of diet Coke in the morning and refer to it as my “energy juice”. Yes, I have fallen off the  no-dark soda wagon in a bad bad way. I try to not drink the entire liter throughout the day but I am not going to lie, it does happen.

Once I found out I was pregnant I cut off all soda. Well, most. I would have a sip here or there, but being the psycho that I am, thought it might make Ellis into a crazy baby. As if that was avoidable. I also thought it was as good a time as any to stop drinking liquid cancer. Clearly I have relapsed to the point that I feel a morning cup of Coke is actually healthy. Like seriously healthy. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I am out of my little Diet Coke mixer juice (we have one of those ridiculous fizzy water makers) so now I am on to coffee.  I feel like I am cartoon person with a rubber band flinging my heart in and out of my chest. I am not making any sense.

Why do I need so much caffeine today? Oh, I don’t know. Maybe because EK has been sick since Friday and slept for -12 hours. Don’t rolll your eyes, it’s totally possible to sleep for -12 hours. We spent the weekend in St. Charles while Mr. Swirley kicked it with his friends up in La Crosse. Ellis decided it was an appropriate time to get a low grade fever and cling to me like baby chimp. He even needed to “sleep” in my arms. I realize that sleeping with your baby sounds nice and all, but note the quotation marks. His “sleeping” consisted of rolling around, crying, nuzzling, laying on top/across me, pushing me off the bed/couch to the point I had to hold myself up by putting my arm on the ground. We ended up “sleeping” on the floor to ensure that 1) he wouldn’t fall off the bed and 2) my head wouldn’t fall off due to lack of support. I do feel badly for him but know this, I seriously considered dropping him off at daycare at 4AM this morning with a note that said “Good luck. No givebacks.”

During the four minutes that EK slept on Saturday, Mrs. D and I made some fresh pesto and a loaf of yellow squash bread. In usually Annie fashion I overfilled the bread pan and what should have taken 45 minutes to cook took 90. It was actually pretty tasty which was surprising given the length of time it sat in the oven.

See the lump in front of the pan? That is the “overflow” area. This is very common baking method employed
by only the best chefs.

Ellis also took his first steps this weekend – out of sheer panic. Apparently he realized he wasn’t being held and took three baby steps to get to me. He did it again Saturday to get to his cousin Carly. He also busted out some new dance moves; he is a huge fan of classic rock. We now have the left foot toe tap, head/shoulder shimmy (his dad’s signature move) and the booty shake. I will do my best to get these on video so you too can enjoy them

Ain’t no fever going to stop him.

 A dog door? No. A baby door.

Off to the doctor. It’s going to be really fun.

p.s. if you are considering a birthday present for Ellis, I highly suggest these sweet Beastie Boys action figures. Proceeds go towards fighting childhood cancer and EK will be THE COOLEST kid ever.