Virginia is for suckers.

I am penning this post from a bed in Virginia. No, I have not been kidnapped. I willingly accepted my colleague’s gracious offer to crash at his digs while I put some face-time in at the office. A lot has gone on the past few weeks including a, same-day trip to and from Madison for a very sad reason, a Badger game at Soldier Field , the end of summer, fun at Lincoln Park Zoo after letting my child run amok at OHOP, a last minute trip with two babies to a country consignment sale in a Prius…at rush hour,  and some other stuff I can’t remember because I spent the day at Costco and am still coming down from my self-induced rage (with the help of two Stellas and some homemade crabcakes.)

Ellis had hand, foot and mouth last week. I tried to drop him off at daycare with “a weird diaper rash” and they shut me down (rightly so.) As a result, I had the privilege of working at home with a one-year old by my side. And if you didn’t know (because I didn’t) foot and mouth is NOT the same as hoof and mouth. Also, in case you were wondering, Ellis can still play the “I am a newborn” game and get up every hour, on the hour and scream his face off. It’s super fun and the best birth control EVER.

Here are some pictures to prove that just because I am too lazy to write a blog post, we are still leaving the house every day.

Lincoln Park Zoo with Ms. Lisa B and young Avner


Random run in with our friends before the game. Ellis is super excited.

Grass looks fine from up here. The Bears are such whiners.

I am not sure how cool it is to cuddle with your mom at a football game, but Ellis was totally into it.

Waiving to his fans

So tired.

Time to set the dream machine so I can head to bed and relive today, tomorrow.

Mogę zrobić dziecku płakać

I have been neglecting updating this blog for no reason other than I have better things to do. Just kidding, I don’t really have much to do. I am just lazy. Here is a summary of the past two weeks –

Lou turned two. TWO!!! He was just a baby, like, yesterday. A tiny little squishy man.

He was about 7lbs in this picture. The baby, not the cat. The cat weighs 42 lbs.
I love this picture of him. Love love love.

I don’t know how this happens, but apparently it is unstoppable. You know what else is unstoppable? Me with a camera when there are children in a bathtub. I obviously mean this in the most innocent way. Since both of our cameras simultaneously broke and I don’t care much for our back-up, T-bone loaned us his DSLR for the weekend to capture moments such as these…

Another one to break-out at the rehearsal dinner(s).
So coy.
John Deere + sugar + a little brotherly assistance = deliciousness and probably a stomach ache

Swinging Swingens
Scheduled work break
Lady Jayne wrangles the boys

Cousins. I am a little terrified of what the future holds in terms of boyhood shenanigans.
Swimming with pops. This time we avoided a freak out.

I am very happy we moved back to the Midwest if only to celebrate second birthdays with ice cream cakes decorated by mini-farm equipment.

We arrived back to Chicago just in time to enjoy a little bit of Wicker Park fest. Ellis wasn’t in his most hipster ensemble, but we decided to brave the crowds and hope they didn’t notice our un-skinny jeans and EK’s lack of neon 80s inspired gafas del sol..Ellis also showed off some of his new head-bobbing moves. I don’t know why I am so thrilled he knows what “dance” means, but I am pretty sure he feels like a monkey since I yell “dance Ellis dance” 23 hours a day. I spend the other hour asking him to “eat”,  “wave” or telling him “not for Ellis”. Poor child.

Look – we made it!.
Wicker Park Welcome Committee. Located next to the stage speakers. Very responsible of us, no?

Then another week of zillion degree days and Ellis deciding to wake up and scream for 12 hours in a row at night just because. I definitely played into his antics a bit and was reminded of what it feels like to have a one week old (read: baby sleeping on you or screaming, or both). Except this baby weighs 22 pounds and crushes my diaphragm. Anywhoo, I caught onto his game after the first two nights of restlessness and vertical sleep. My new strategy consists of me rocking in a chair next to the crib while I hum and he looks directly at me and screams at the top of his lungs.. But mom is “winning”…if “winning” means watching your baby cry big fat tears while you sing the chorus to “Yellow Submarine” for an hour straight. I  really should look up those lyrics.

Last Friday we went to Highland Park and met up with Ellis’ newest friend, young Avner and his mama Ms. Lisa B. Um, the Highland Park community pool is probably, no, is the nicest pool I have ever visited. Sorry Shorewood. Lucky for them, I wore my fanciest swimsuit…a stretched out pair of bottoms (I was unaware of my lack of elastic rump support until I slipped them on in the changing room), nursing bra and tank top. You can take the girl out of the city…Yikes. I am not sure they will ever have me back, but it was a good time. And both boys napped! In their strollers. Bonkers. Ms. Lisa B and I drank rum and cokes and pretended to be on a laid back vacation which was almost possible except for the flirting co-eds running circles around our stroller island. I didn’t get called ma’am, so that is a success in its own right, right?

Saturday I got up and ran out to a group garage sale put on by a bunch of attachment parenting moms. They were talking about weaning their kids at age 3.5 and seemed to question my “parenting philosophy” (their words) when I said EK was off the boob at one. Oh well. I hung around the shadows near the table filled with tiny shoes like the stalker I am and waited for the used Ergo to arrive. I was so excited for that sucker and now Ellis hates it. What a surprise. I am hoping it is because he was so hot when we first put it on but am pretty sure it’s because it would make me too happy if he liked the carrier.

Sunday was a day dedicated to all things Polish. By that I mean Pierogifest in Whiting, IN. Have you been? You haven’t? Something is seriously wrong with you. It’s year two for us and Ellis was so excited for his first foray into Slavic cuisine except for the part of actually consuming the food. He stuck with Os and water. Harumph. More meaty-cheesy goodness for me.

Just a quick snack
The Whiting Chamber of Commerce should drop their current slogan and go with: Visit. Here. Next. Year. That’s right, I got my undergrad degree in advertising. It’s obvious, isn’t it?

One year ago – Ellis in the belly with the Babushkas
2011 – They still love EK!

And the biggest news, aside from the debt ceiling agreement, is that Ellis still isn’t walking. He is climbing stairs really fast and can fall down them even faster. I also made a baby cry today and it wasn’t mine! Perhaps that is a hint that I should stop picking up other people’s children. Perhaps.